Thursday, June 19, 2008

Moving through a block

I've been feeling as if I'm in a bit of a rut this week. It's hard to explain. Sometimes, when I have a project that I need to get done in a short period of time, I have a terrible time getting started. Maybe it's the fear of making a "mistake" that I won't be able to "fix." Or the doubt that I'm even capable of making what I have in mind. Whatever I am letting hold me back, it isn't real. It's just my head, spinning more silly tales that I don't have to believe.

So, I'm taking a deep breath. In. Out.

I can do this. Whatever comes from this process, it will be just what it needs to be in this moment. I am making a gift. A gift for a friend that won't be in my life as much any more. I will miss her. And I wish her great joy, because she is moving to something she's wanted to do for a long time. It's a wonderful event. I want to make her a little something, a little token of the love and fellowship we have shared. So whatever my hands make, my heart will be full of love while making it, and it will be a fine gift.

I keep reminding myself: trust the process. Do not be attached to what you think the outcome should be. It won't come out that way -- it never does! I am always amazed when I finish making something -- the actual "doing" transforms what I originally envisioned, and the results are often even better than I could have hoped. Certainly, more interesting. It's all good.

I trust. I relax into the doing. The final product will be what it needs to be, perfect in the moment.

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